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A Matter Of Worldly Preference

To:
Jesus Christ, Son of Joseph
The Messianic Company Unlimited
1 Carpenter Street
Nazareth, Galilee
Israel

Dear Sir,

Thank You for submitting the resumes of the twelve men whom You have chosen for managerial positions in Your new organization. All of them have taken our comprehensive series of consultation tests. We have not only run their results through our computer, but also arranged personal interviews for each of them with our psychologist and professional consultant. The profiles of all the tests are included. You may desire to study each of them carefully. But as part of our service, we will make some general statements.

It is our staff opinion that most of Your nominees are lacking in background, education, and vocational aptitude for the type of enterprise You are undertaking. They neither have the team concept nor make a good team. We would recommend that You should continue to search for alternative persons of better experience, leadership and proven capability.

Below is a brief summary:

  • Simon Peter is emotionally unstable, compulsive and given to fits of temper.

  • Andrew has absolutely no qualities for leadership.

  • The two sons of Thunder, James and John, place personal interest above company loyalty.

  • Philip is too calculative and lacks initiative.

  • Nathaniel, also named Bartholomew, seems to enjoy idling under a fig tree.

  • Thomas demonstrates a questioning attitude that would tend to undermine morale.

  • Matthew, the ex-tax collector, has been blacklisted by the Jerusalem Tax And Business Bureau.

  • James, the son of Alphaeus, is hyper-depressive.

  • Lebbaeus Thaddaeus is of questionable character and conduct.

  • Simon the Zealot is a political activist, wanting to overthrow the Roman government.

Only one of the twelve candidates shows great potential. He is a man of ability and resourcefulness. He meets people well, and has a keen business mind. He has contacts in high places, and is highly motivated, ambitious and responsible. We strongly recommend Judas Iscariot as Your Chief Financial Controller and Your right-hand man.

All their profiles are self-explanatory. Please feel free to call upon us for more information or clarification. We wish You every success in Your new venture.

Sincerely Yours,
Jordan Management Consultants
Jerusalem, Israel


Edited on:
27 December 2005